1.) Not everything is epic. In fact, very few things are epic. As borrowed from the bestsiteintheuniverse.com, here is a good rationalization/explanation:
Here is a comprehensive list of all things epic:
- Oceans. Oceans are "massive and imposing in scale or size;" literally epic.
- Literary tales of heroism, many of which include voyages across oceans are epics.
- The cosmos are epic.
That's it. Lengthy narratives.
Also...The
2.) Just like "epic," not everything is amazing. Pencil skirts? Not amazing. Do they actually AMAZE you? Cause you wonderment? Then not amazing. Basketball games? Not amazing. New bangs? Defininitely not amazing. This word has been demoted, and now means little more than "cool" or "awesome," but is now way overused, and out of context, to boot. (I read somewhere recently that the overuse of the word "amazing" may soon lead to the renaming of "Amazing Grace" to "Pretty Good Grace" or something just as lame.) I could say the same thing about the word "awesome," but it's too late for that one now. It's already been demoted. Don't let "amazing" meet the same fate.
3.) "Long story short." I'm actually including this one for my sister, even though I have definitely done this a time or two or seven. Have you ever noticed that this sentence comes toward the end of what has likely already been one of the longest stories ever?
4.) "You know?" Along the same lines, the interjection of this short phrase several times in a conversation will drive me bonkers. Yes, I know. I know because you're telling me right now, remember?
5.) Ellipsis (n.): Three points or "dots" used in writing to indicate hesitation or faultering speech and to shorten quotations when necessary without changing the meaning. Three dots. Just three. Not two. Not seven. Certainly not twelve. Three.
6.) Finally, a simple and harmless phrase, used in writing or in speech, and especially used in Facebook status updates, which has no bearing on anyone else's life, but is completely annoying in its own right: "I have the (best or other adjective) (insert noun) ever!" For example, "My husband is the smartest, funniest, most handsome man EVER!", "My kid is the most well-behaved child in the universe EVER!" Really, ever? In the whole universe? We all think this from time to time. I know that. And to be fair, I'm sure both said husband and child are great, but let's be a little realistic. Just sometimes. And please, please, please, for my sake and all of grammar's long-standing guidelines, please stop saying "bestest." I'm so sorry to be so demanding, but please.
4.) "You know?" Along the same lines, the interjection of this short phrase several times in a conversation will drive me bonkers. Yes, I know. I know because you're telling me right now, remember?
5.) Ellipsis (n.): Three points or "dots" used in writing to indicate hesitation or faultering speech and to shorten quotations when necessary without changing the meaning. Three dots. Just three. Not two. Not seven. Certainly not twelve. Three.
6.) Finally, a simple and harmless phrase, used in writing or in speech, and especially used in Facebook status updates, which has no bearing on anyone else's life, but is completely annoying in its own right: "I have the (best or other adjective) (insert noun) ever!" For example, "My husband is the smartest, funniest, most handsome man EVER!", "My kid is the most well-behaved child in the universe EVER!" Really, ever? In the whole universe? We all think this from time to time. I know that. And to be fair, I'm sure both said husband and child are great, but let's be a little realistic. Just sometimes. And please, please, please, for my sake and all of grammar's long-standing guidelines, please stop saying "bestest." I'm so sorry to be so demanding, but please.
Haha! Love these. I have to hear epic fail 100 times a day and it makes me want to scream!
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