?

I'm updating this as a promise to my sister, but I find myself at a loss of words.  Strangely, this week has been overly-eventful.  However, due to the public nature of this blog, I struggle with what's not blog-worthy...or blog-ready.  Stemming from my sister's brimming excitement about the future, my brother's new and optimistic take on life, and my own happily-weary contentment with Patrick's upcoming birthday and Leo's apparent dislike of any stage beyond infancy, I have 1,000 words, and not-a-one flows coherently to form a single paragraph for this blog.

As I write this, I am sitting on the couch in polka-dotted pajama pants and a brown hoodie.  My hair is in a ponytail and I am wearing my glasses.  I have a mug of coffee with Cinnabun creamer.  I have the "family blanket" that my oldest friend, Erin, made when Patrick was born draped over my icicle feet.  Patrick is sitting next to me and Leo is asleep on my chest.  The laptop is propped between two pillows, just to get it at the right angle that makes it possible to type with one free hand and the other gimp one, whose attached arm is caught under Leo's leg.  And I love it.  My friend, Courtney, described this scenario last week as how she pictured me at home.  And she was dead-on.  I suppose I am not one of those people who is surrounded in mystery.  It's pretty clear how I like to live.  And what I love.  And, in addition, I have composed these lists:

Things I love (aside from the obvious):
1.) Coffee...with creamer.  Especially special holiday or limited varieties.  And, on Thanksgiving, Half-and-half.
2.) Netflix and Hulu
3.) Boots and short dresses (not necessarily paired together, but maybe).
4.) Long, hot showers.  The kind that fog up the entire bathroom and nearly scald your skin. 
5.) Internet shopping.
6.) Health food stores.
7.) Tiny restaurants, especially tiny brunch restaurants, especially if they offer a variety of omelets.
8.) 3pm--The magical time when the naps of both boys almost always overlaps.  The TV is not on, the house is picked up, and sometimes it's when I can squeeze in one of those showers that I love.
9.)  February...and March...and May and October.   Well, really whenever the weather starts to turn + February.
10.) Text messages.  As a non-phone person, these were created for people like me.

Things I Do Not Like:
1.) Mispronunciation of common words
2.) Action movies
3.) French fries, generally
4.) Over-explanations.  I suspect I am guilty of this.
5.) Allergies.
6.) Toys with broken or missing parts, but which also happen to be favorites.  These create an ethical dilemma.
7.) That I was taught to spell dilemma like "dilemna" and then told later that was incorrect. 
8.) Fat-free foods.  Nobody seriously thinks they "taste the same," right? 
9.) Spongebob.  And Dora. 
10.) Personal talk at the checkout counter.  If you must do it, make sure it ends by the time your stuff is bagged.  There is nothing worse than having to listen to the tail end of the story about your cat and the oven mitt while my arms are cramped stiff holding an economy size box of diapers, laundry detergent, deodorant, and milk.  Please.

Things About Which I am Currently Lukewarm:
1.) Adam's new TV.  At the moment, I am torn between loving the space it seems to create and hating the fact that I cannot watch a single program in entirety without having to split-screen it while Adam tries to get "the picture just right."  It almost makes me not want to watch anything at all.  This TV teters on the fine line between the two lists above.

Happy Monday.

Oh, this Leo Walden.  I could eat his face off, he's so cute today. 

Happy Birthday, Gavin!!

Happy birthday to my very sweet, sensitive, hilarious, thoughtful, rule-following, and clever little nephew!  Five years ago today, the growth of our little family was set in motion.  It was a perfect day for us all (very much including your Uncle Bubbie.  He cried like you were his own.  He has loved you from the minute you were born, Gavin.  We all have!)  Wherever you go, happiness just follows.  Happy Birthday, little Buddy!!

Psych, Day 1

I had my "Orientation" clinical day for Mental Health Nursing today.  At least, that is what I think happened.  To be honest, I have no idea what really happened today, aside from being on a locked unit with no restroom access.  Seriously.  It's all a blur.  (It's a long story and, rather than offend or tell stories, let's just leave it at that.)  As I left a little early (nice!), a part of me wanted to sneak off with my extra two hours, go order a pile of fried pickles and a beer, and sit by myself in silence.  However, I came home...and indulged in some ice cream and Bavarian hefeweizen.  That'll work.

Adam, the optimist, tells me that good came out of my day.  He could tell that I was a little on edge as I walked through the door, and he insists that I discovered a field that is certainly not for me.  I sort of knew that already, but he's right.  Now I know for sure.  This is not to say that nurses in this field aren't great.  They are!  Oh, they are incredible.  It takes a very special type of person for this job, and I know that it's not me.  It just isn't.  Twenty more hours to completion of this clinical requirement, and that's okay by me.  I'm sure it'll be fine.  I'm sure it'll be fine.  I'm sure it'll...  Ok, I hope it'll be fine.

I just realized that there is a way to see page views and audience. (By country, that is.  Relax, it doesn't give me your IP address or city.  That's for you, little stalker.  Yes, I know about you.  You can take a breath now.)

Anyway, I realized that I have a decent number of international hits.  International!  I am kind of excited, only because I kind of figured that it was just my family and a few friends who read this.  As it turns out, maybe I do actually have an "audience."  Who knew?  On that note, hello Japan, Canada, Mexico, Austria, Belgium, the UK, Netherlands, and Norway.  HELLO!!!

PS- I am blatantly procrastinating my psych nursing review tonight.  Blatantly.

8.5 months

These logs are more for my own memory, but I forgot to add a little quip about Leo A. at 8 months.  Rather than wait until he's 9 months, here is the story:

1.) Hair is finally growing, filling in his little exposed scalp.  Color?  Medium auburn.
2.) Working on teeth 9 and 10 (top first molars), and the teething is getting easier for him...finally.
3.) Can eat table food without problem (see above).
4.) Is standing unassisted for a few seconds at a time and can push walking-toys
5.) Has been sick lately, but is generally pretty healthy.
6.) Loves, loves, loves his parents.  Patrick is a close runner-up.  (Still loves me best.  I'm not afraid to say it.)
7.) Says "Mama" and "baba" (bottle) with obvious meaning.  I swear I have heard him say "hi mama" four times now, but I don't know how intentional it is.  Three of those were upon entering his room, so maybe?  Too soon to tell.
8.) Falls constantly.  Constantly.  If I was that kind of parent, I would definitely invest in a helmet.  Thank goodness for soft furniture.  Curse hardwood floors.

Life Decisions, Life Decisions...

Leo Walden chose his profession today.  He thought and sorted through all kinds of options, from a rock star to a lawyer to an x-ray technician...and after much thought (and a tough decision between two contending life commitments), Leo grasped on to one tightly and smiled.  Patrick clapped and cheered.  Leo will one day grow up to be...an umpire.

Ok, fine, not really.  Well, sort of.  For Patrick's first Christmas, he got a set of Korean fortune blocks, building blocks that each have a career on them.  It's a Korean tradition that a baby is sat in the middle of a circle of blocks.  The one that he/she picks up and holds close first is what his/her destiny is.  Patrick very quickly chose his path as a veterinarian.  Leo really did take his time.  He looked.  He touched.  He thought about a zoo keeper for quite some time.  His little eyes settled on the umpire block, though, and it was to be his.  In a way, fitting.  Our little scientist chose a path in zoology.  Our little brut chose sports.  I know there is nothing to these, but I do love them.  I have been waiting to pull these out for Leo.  (Patrick still uses them to build towers, so it's a wonder that they are all still intact.)

As a sidenote, a friend once commented that these blocks were not really realistic.  She said they should have thrown in a few bad life choices like "con artist" or "crack addict."  True, true.  Then again, who wants to see an eight month old choose that block?  Eesh.  "Sorry, honey.  The future is not so bright for little Eli.  It looks like our baby is going to find his way as an exotic dancer."  I'll keep my umpire; thanks so much.

Lessons in Child-Rearing

This has been circulating Facebook slowly for the past week or more, but I thought it was too cute (and fairly true) not to share.  Granted, it's all written for humor, but just goes to show you that one of the greatest jobs in the world is certainly not the most glamorous.  

Lesson 1
1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the paper.
5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.

Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...

1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)

Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4
Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out...
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.
    Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

Lesson 10
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

You are now ready to have children.  Go forth and wreak havok!  Good luck!

We Have an Angel

It's been a year since life in the Walden family changed so suddenly. It's been a year since a sweet angel was born, so small and so powerful, that she was able to change the way each of us has viewed life...a life so meaningful that she made us all better people--more patient and understanding, more unconditionally loving, and stronger as a family unit. As if we don't think of her every day as it is, these last few have really driven home how much things have changed this past year. Here is what I have learned:


Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of good or bad luck. Illness, death, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. Even in pain, we are able to find our purposes.

If someone hurts you, betrays you , or breaks you heart, forgive them.  Even if you don't want to, just do it.  You'll feel better.  There just isn't enough time for nonsense.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because they are opening your heart and eyes to things you would have never seen or felt without them.

Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again. Silliness isn't really silly at all.

Talk to people you have never talked to before. Listen. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Create your own life and then go out and live it.

Family is the beginning and end of all things. Others come and go, but our family...we're tied together for life. Every little bump along the way (even the major ones) rattles us, but in the end, each one is the reason we hold on to each other a little tighter, can know what the other is feeling in just a look, laugh too loud at family jokes, and really appreciate this little life we have.

And Pretty Little Cora Anne, an angel in every sense (a REAL one, as Patrick says), taught all of this in a week.

I admit, I take my husband for granted.  He's not a kid who needs constant attention and guidance.  Sometimes, he's quiet enough that it's easy to work around him.  For that, I am regretful.  On days like today, one in which his hard work begins to uncover a glimmer of a pretty bright future for us, I am very thankful that I married such a good man.  He works like crazy to take care of this family and it's starting to pay off.  Among other things, it makes me happy to hear the excitement in his voice when he recounts a good day.  Much like my own Dad and Grandfathers, I am happy that I married a man who has pride in working hard for the sake of his family.  Maybe that's old-fashioned--it makes no difference to me if it is.  I value it. 

Amen for Adam and his incredible work ethic.  Even if I cringe when he gets a work call at home and pout when he has to work late into the night or on the weekend, I know he does it because he has a drive.  My fingers are crossed that our boys inherited some of that.  

Winter Outings, Day 2

Once again, we were out and about this morning in an attempt to really take advantage of this last week of break.  First on the agenda, breakfast with my sister.  Sadly for her, breakfast with me does not always mean leisurely conversation.  (Well, it can, but it also means stopping every few minutes/seconds for a "stop that," what do you need?" "you need to take a bite, please," or "Ok, give me just a second.")  Thank goodness she's a good sport about it. 

After that came a visit to Titi (my sister-in-law, Katie) and last stop: The Children's Museum.  While we went with the intention of just riding the carousel and leaving, Patrick got really nervous about the horses again and insisted that he only rides that with Daddy.  (He had tears in his eyes.  I'm pretty sure he meant it.)  As not wanting to waste a trip, we hit up the house of mirrors.  And then the village of houses.  And then Scienceworks.  Playscape.  Barbie.  Playscape again.  Racecar.  Watch the slide.  Dinosaurs.  Whew.  It was so much fun, though.  We really need to renew our membership next month.  Leo is so content in his little sling and Patrick makes friends anywhere.  I actually made a friend, too, which was kind of nice.  Well, it was really nice.  I love normal moms.  Wow, that sounds bad.  Fine, I admit it, I like moms like me.  Shoot me.   

As we left, I took another sentimental detour, right past the Allison Mansion, where our wedding reception was held.  I caught my breath as we pulled in.  Wow.  It's been exactly five years since we chose that place for our reception (before I ever got the ring, actually.)  I remember the excitement of it all; how happy I was to be getting married.  Adam gripping my hand in the marble sunroom.  "This is it, this is it.  This is it."  As I turned to look in the backseat at my two sleeping sons...well...there aren't words, really.  If I was happy then, I don't know what to call myself now.  Blessed is the closest I can come to anything, and that barely touches it. 

Both boys are sleeping soundly, neither one even woke up from the car-to-bed transfer.  Two days of successful outings.  Just a few more days left.

Holiday Photos (Christmas-NY's)

Our Tree:

Happy Birthday to Jesus:

Our Family:

Grandad:

Aunt Maddie:

Christmas Morning (several photos below in this category):

                                           The boys with their boys:

                                      Kids relaxing after present time:

                                        The Waldens, NYE:

                                              This is how super-heroes hug:

                     The crew on NYE (including Baby Ruthie):

           Patiently waiting to open presents (Cincy Family Christmas):

                                                    Sweet Leo:

Patrick showcasing one of his many costumes:

Memory Lane

In desperate need of a day out today (refusing to sit at home for the last few days of Christmas break), Patrick, Leo and I had a nice little lunch together at Paradise Cafe.  Even tiny Leo enjoyed some tortilla strips dipped in tomato soup.  Having no idea what we were going to do next, I decided to call my old boss to see if he would be in for a visit.  It has been a while since I visited my former workplace, having left just two months after Adam and I got married.  Thankfully, he was in, so we stopped by the bakery for cupcakes and headed north to my old stomping grounds.

Sigh.  I miss that area.  As I was driving, it just became second nature.  The turns, the right lanes to get in for the most efficient traffic maneuvering...  We stayed much longer than we meant to, partially because Patrick was in heaven with so many new people to talk to, and we got to see several old coworkers (Hi, Rob!).  After leaving, I decided to take Patrick (Leo was asleep) on a little This-Was-My-Life tour.  We went by my two old apartments as I explained to Patrick that these were the places Mommy lived before he was around.  We talked about how I lived by myself and with my sister.  As I drove really slowly past the last place (my favorite one), I must have changed my terminology to "This is where I lived when I was single."

Here is what ensued:

Patrick:  Wha-a---a---  Whaaa-at is single?
Mom: It means before I was married to your Daddy.
Patrick:  Ok.  Buuuuut you are not single now.  You are my Mom now.
Mom:  I know.  I married your Daddy and we had you and Leo. 
Patrick:  Uh-huh.  A--aaa---aaaand now you run and jump and laugh really loud because you are so happy.
Mom:  You are literally my favorite person right now.
Patrick (thumb in mouth):  Mm-hmm.

We've come a long way, baby.